Self-Relization

Do you ever have times when you are alone and thinking quite deeply about who you are? I had one of those times on Tuesday as I drove alone in the car to a brunch with some ladies. It was a 40 minute drive through the beautiful hills of the San Andreas Fault with a lovely blue sky half-covered with gorgeous white & gray clouds of varying heights and textures. It helped that I was listening to Josh Groban's new cd on our car's stereo system...such beautiful music, and the catalyst to the thinking that brought about some self-realization.

As I listened to various aspects of the music, I realized that most if not all the songs are based on a waltz rythm. A very classic form of music. The songs include strings and drums (specifically snare) that are traditional instruments for the waltz. The voices that would match the waltz would be operatic. But this is Josh Groban style -- popera as some have termed it. His tone is modern, his talent classic. He combines the strings and other orchestra elements with electric guitar and keyboard. Classic but modern. Tradition with a twist, if you will.

And this thought process brought me to realize that is also what was said of my wedding -- Tradition with a Twist. We had candlelight, but it was black iron with fat pillar candles rather than metalic holders with taper candles. We had black attire with splashes of silver paisley print. My dress was oh-so-formal, a classic ball gown with lace, pearls, and sequins and a sleek satin ribon at the waist. A picture perfect formally classic evening wedding...with crazy bright flowers and Phil Keagy's music. A not-far cry from what it was going to be -- all red roses. That one change in flower choice made my wedding what I'd always dreamed it to be rather than feeling stifled by "traditionally typical." (Note: Red roses are great for others, just not me.)

I'm a wife and mother who stays at home. I have a degree in Home Economics. What would I be if I worked in the secular world? A geneticist -- preferably on the cutting edge of genetic counseling technology. Talk about two occupations worlds apart as far as knowledge, skill, work place, demansd, and hours. The only thing linking the two is that a genetic counselor helps moms have babies.

Then it hit me. This theme is the fiber of my being. All that I am and hope to be stems from the "tradition with a twist" idea. It may sound silly, but for me it runs very deep and at times is very perplexing and frustrating. I am traditional -- manners, dress, speech, beliefs, values, etc. And I know that is what many people see me as. But it is frustrating when I can see how much MORE there is to me, what lies deep within my heart and head that is so different from my exterior. And I can't share it with everyone because it would take years of knowing me. I'm not even sure it is something that can be put into words; you just have to learn it, see it, recognize it, and take it seriously. I would never wish to do away with my traditional side for it is definitely part of who I am...not just a facade. Everyone sees the sturdy ship, but some are keen enough to get a glimpse of the mermaid at its side.

But then I wondered -- is this dichotomy really who I am, or is it spirit versus flesh. Another way "tradition with a twist" manifests itself is as a goody-two-shoes spitfire. I was even teased about being a goody-two-shoes in school (I even remember the guy's name). I've been seen in that light all my life. Praise God, I suppose. Better that than other names girls can be called. But oh how hypocritical I can be BECAUSE I do have that goody-two-shoes repuation. No one sees inside my heart like I do, save for the Holy Spirit. Just the other day, I was with some ladies and we played a game where they had to say the first word that came to their mind when they thought of me. "Sweet, creative, cute, sensitive" were the words said. Gee. How nice. Then I had to take a turn and all these sins came to mind. I chose impatient and they looked at me like it couldn't be true. People, I have an impatience, anger, and pride problem. Yes, I said anger. That's the spitfire in me. I praise God I don't have a huge ability to speak on my feet -- trust me, my silence is golden when I am worked up about something whether it be something from the news or something you've done or not done. If I'm silent, it usually means I am sifting through what to say and what not to say. Push me to speak when I'm not ready, and we'll both probably regret it. (Just ask my husband.) Anyone suprised at this? I kind of hope so. It's feels good to shock people by revealing more of myself -- it lets me know that I'm a real person in their eyes rather than someone who has it all and keeps it together.

My conclusion is that this self-relization is both who I am and also a slight display of spirit vs. flesh. I have a strong foundation and sturdy walls, but walk inside and you'll find a fairytale land ruled by a head-strong maiden. I am Diana AND Anne. I am a sweet little rebel. I am that Urbandale table, modern with a touch of country. I dance to the waltz in a beautiful ballgown...among the clouds with the moon my spotlight.

I praise God for who He has made me to be. At least I know He knows just how deep this traditionally twisted thread runs within me...He put it there.

Sunrise Story

The path of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, shining ever brighter until the full light of day. ~Proverbs 4:18

As I awake here on my bed,
I am thinking of the day ahead.
There's quite a long list of to-do's;
Oh, which priorities will I choose?
My walls are golden glory;
The sun has begun this day's story.

And my soul is found in You,
A sunrise, beautiful and new.
First gleam growing to full light;
Radiant colors burst into sight.
When evening comes, let me say,
"I chose You above all today."

There was a man who had no bed;
They laid a crown of thorns on His head.
The Morning Star and Great I Am
Became my own sacrificial Lamb.
Giving up His heav'nly glory,
He completed Redemption's story.

And my soul is found in You,
A sunrise, beautiful and new.
First gleam growing to full light;
Radiant colors burst into sight.
You chose Night so I could see
The righteous path blazed just for me.

I'm here upon my final bed;
My mind wonders of the Night ahead.
My life is now over, now through.
And did I do all I could for You?
Now I see the golden Glory,
Sunrise of my eternal story.

Now my soul is found in You,
A sunrise, beautiful and new.
First gleam growing to full light;
Radiant colors burst into sight.
Evening now will never come;
My eyes have seen the eternal Son.

Interview Question 2

Name one thing you believe your husband deserves more of from the world around him. Now name one thing he deserves more of from you.

Well, to set things straight, he would say he deserves nothing. But since you've given me license to brag (and I thank you for it!)...

I believe my husband deserves more recognition. He is very much a "behind the scenes" kind of guy, never wanting public recognition for what he does and always inconveniencing himself for the sake of others. He is VERY smart, an excellent problem solver, and retains information like no one I've known before (something I envy!). He really is a Renaissance man -- draws, writes, sings, builds, fixes, computes. But what I love most is his servant's heart. He uses what he has been given to help others, especially in the technology arena. He never asks for thanks and has even been known to specifically request that his name not be mentioned. He's a hidden treasure, and I'm glad I get to see every last gem and coin!

From me, I believe my husband deserves a longer fuse. I can be quite impatient and easily annoyed/angered, to my sinful fault. Too many times have I given him the "silent treatment" over silly things that do not matter. He can be quite playful and boyish at times which I believe is just part of his personality -- and yet it is at those times that I can be annoyed greatly (ex: repeating the same noise over and over and over...and over). I am much more structured than him when it comes to household tasks and can huff over a shirt folded wrong (he now knows that I WANT to fold 100% of the laundry...because I LIKE it my way). One "wrong" word or look from him, and I can be put out for the rest of the day. This is not to say these situations ALWAYS happen, but they happen too easily when they do. To the point, he's a relaxed guy who deserves a more relaxed wife. This is something I have really been working on lately because I want him to enjoy life at home even more than he already does! Not to mention it's a log in my eye I'm trying to lumberjack out...

Interview Question 1

Galant has included me in the "Interview Game" he was tagged with, and I have finally started to answer his WELL thought out and heart searching questions. I love being asked questions that force me to evaluate both my head and my heart about various areas pertaining to life and godliness. So here is the first, and what I consider to be best, question and answer.

How has being a mother and a wife affected your perspective on your faith, what do you see now about life and faith and God that you did not before you were married and before you were a mother?

I would say the number one way marriage has changed my perspective of faith is that it has shown me the reality of the relationship between Christ and His Bride, the Church. It is easier for me to now see how deep the analogy goes...and how MUCH husbands and wives fail to fulfill our rolls. I see the beauty in Christ's perfect love for His imperfect Bride. He gave His life so She can wear a white wedding dress. He sees no spot in Her, understands Her, wants nothing but the best for Her, serves Her. She submits to His leadership, protection, comfort, and romance. She knows She can trust Him fully with Her whole being -- spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical. He'll never leave no matter where she fails or exceeds. She'll strive to love and serve Him all her days. It's a gorgeous display of opposites that create a beautiful whole: humble leadership, powerful submission, open-handed loyalty, blind understanding (knowing a persons deepest faults but choosing to look beyond them, in other words unconditional love). Marriage is hard because it's two sinners living life together, and yet the spiritual benefits flow into every area of life making every trial, every mundane routine, every stinging conviction of sin (daily) well worth the fight to keep the treasure of a sacred marriage...one that, though imperfect, models the ultimate couple, Christ and the Church. (And I highly suggest Sacred Marriage by Gary L. Thomas as reading for couples in any year of marriage!)

The first thought that comes to mind when thinking of how being a mother has affected my perspective of faith is one so simple that I am ashamed to admit it but feel refreshed to share. I have finally come to a true understanding of what my desire for the lost is to feel like. I have never felt that deep passion for somone to come to Christ until now. I have never fully realized a person's utter need for a Savior to deliver him from sin and allow him a seat in eternity before the throne of God. I now know the ache in a mother's heart for her children to have a personal relationship with the One who created them. It is a deep seated physical ache in my heart, but it is definitely a good one. One that makes my heart feel more alive than ever to the spiritual life of a human being. Never have I prayed for another's salvation more than I have my son's...all because I never saw the urgency and desperation first hand like this. I have been so surrounded by Christian family, friends, teachers, coworkers, etc. for my WHOLE life that opportunity to go beyond that "bubble" was very limited -- left to my own courage to step out and meet unbelievers, a courage that I have always lacked. Now, I can't say that I have been able to extend this new discovery fully to others besides my little one; but I hope that someday soon the Lord will give me capacity to place the same perspective on other unbelievers. I think it is all still very new to me, and I am still learning how to channel my heart's ache into action -- finding every which way I can to pray for and train Judah in the ways of the Lord. While I do hope that this new perspective will spread to other unbelievers who will cross my path of life, I know that if I am used only once to bring another into the Kingdom, my life has been well spent...especially if it meant my son would be part of the King's audience.

Today's read brought to you by...

Ben. Get ready for some conviction.

http://www.reformationaries.blogspot.com/

Psalm 119:38

Normally I do not even have any electronics on while doing my devotions. But today is different. I had to stop where I was, turn on the computer, and proclaim my thoughts to all! They are too amazing to stay contained in my finite brain!

Confirm to Your servant Your promise, that You may be feared.

Such a short, sweet verse. It has profound thoughts in between the lines!

Confirm ~ to prove and establish. David is asking God to prove His words to be true again and again. If David can ask, I can too. I am finite and need constant confirmation that God is who He says He is.

Your Servant ~ the occupation we should all hold most dear and do our utmost best at. I thank God I am even allowed to be called His servant!

Your Promise ~ God's Word, the Bible. Everything that is contained in the Bible is straight from the heart of God. It is full of promises to those who love Him AND to those who do not love Him.

Feared ~ awe, reverence, and obedience. He is PERFECT in His goodness, righteousness, and justice. He WILL follow through with His every promise. That alone commands reverence and obedience because no one else can perform such a task!

Here is what is more amazing to me. I sat there looking at a book. It has pages and a binding with lots and lots of words. It is just a thing. Just another history book. All the stories in it are just stories we have to believe happened like all the rest of history. But there is ONE difference. The Author made some promises, and He keeps them to prove that He is God of the Universe! What other history book has one author who makes some promises throughout the stories he records and then is able to keep the promises? Human authors die. You can not keep promises when you're in the grave. That is exactly why the Bible is the Living Word. It is alive and active, being proven every day through creation, justice, and righteousness! We glean how to live a life of sanctification from it. What can we glean from other history books except stories and what NOT to do politically? Sure, all history is important. But the only history book we should master mentally and spiritually is God's Word. It is the only one that will change the course of our own personal history.

And another thing. Who am I to tell God "Confirm to Your servant Your promise"?? He is God. I am a sinful human. But that's just it. He doesn't mind at ALL proving Himself. When He proves Himself, it brings us to our knees in praise and glory of Him. He is our Friend, and friends prove their loyalty and love without even being asked -- that's part of what friendship is.

So keep going, Lord! Keep on confirming...and because You keep Your promises, I can promise YOU that someday, someday I will not need confirmation anymore...

Because I will see Your face.

Ecclesiastes 8:17

Then I saw all the work of God, that a man cannot find out the work that is done under the sun. For though a man labors to discover it, yet he will not find it; moreover, though a wise man attempts to know it, he will not be able to find it.

Solomon, the wisest man that has ever lived. Wisdom straight from the Throne. And yet he writes, "...though a wise man attempts to know [God's work], he will not be able to find it." From ancient times until sin is abolished, we will NEVER understand how much praise, honor, glory, and awe God deserves. We will never understand just...

how BIG He is

how VAST His POWER

how DEEP His LOVE

how PERFECT His JUSTICE

how PURE His HOLINESS

how UNENDING His GRACE

...even how long this list could be! His ways are not our own, which saves us from the silliest mistake to an eternity in hell. An old hymn says:

Could we with ink the oceans fill and were the skies of parchment made. Were every stalk on earth a quill and every man a scribe by trade. To write the love of God above would drain the oceans dry, Nor could the scroll contain the whole though stretched from sky to sky.

Not to mention our hands would fall off before we were even done with the first page of describing Him!

Sadly, though He is wondrously unexplainable in all of His attributes, we still do not trust Him wholly, love Him fully, and follow Him completely. He holds the universe in one hand, and we can't even trust Him with tomorrow's schedule.

This just shows how MUCH sin has separated us from Him, how sick and blind our flesh is. We should be desperately scrambling to have even one moment with Him. We are so self-centered we think our devotions are for our own benefit. We feel obedient, refreshed, and accomplished. But we really should be meeting with Him daily for HIM...to give HIM glory and praise.

A peasant does not approach his King as an equal intending to have a simple conversation. He enters the throne room on his knees, head bowed, silent praise on his lips. He understands the vast gap between his poor, ragged self and the king's rich majesty. Just even being given a moment in the King's presence makes him give even more glory to the King. But when he leaves the throne room, does he...

~Live like he never visited the King?
~Boast to others about his privilege?
~Long for the day when he can see the King again and tries to tell others they can come too?

Oh, the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of our King! How unsearchable are His judgments and His ways past finding out! For who has known the mind of our King? And who has become His counselor? Or who has first given to Him and it shall be repaid to Him? For of Him and through Him and to Him are all things, to Whom be glory forever. Amen.

~Romans 11:33~

Remember that old children's prayer?

God is great. God is good. Let us thank Him...

...because He even lets us.

Ecclesiastes 8:11

Because the sentence against an evil work is not executed speedily, therefore the heart of the sons of men is fully set in them to do evil.

We are blind without Christ. We sin; and when there are no consequences, pride sets in (yet another sin). We think ourselves invincible, in control of all that pertains to our lives...we are "happy" because we get and do what we want. The longer consequences are not sown, the more we will continue to sin and even more so.

But God is just and righteous. He will judge all of us for our actions whether we receive judgment in life or death (or both). Verse 12 says, "...it will be well with those who fear God..." Obedience brings about freedom from punishment; and coupled with faith in Him, freedom from death to hell.

This verse is not specifically speaking about this next topic, but it is certainly an applicable principle for today. Parents would do well in correcting a child's disobedience. Children must learn early on what is right and what is wrong. They need to know that obedience is saving them from future pitfalls, everything from offending others in social settings to dying by way of a moving car in the street.

Proverbs 13:24 ~ He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him promptly.

Proverbs 22:15 ~ Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; the rod of correction will drive it far from him.

Just as parents encourage children to learn their colors and numbers quickly, so should children learn right and wrong quickly. A rod is much quicker than simply saying "no" over and over again. However, the rod does not just involve physical correction. "Rod" should be defined as correction physically, teaching spiritually, and reconnecting lovingly. Physical correction must be fused with God's Word and parental love so the child understands it is not just the behavior that needs to be modified. A child is not truly corrected unless the heart is changed -- without the heart change, it is only behavior modification which leads to hypocrisy, resentment, and an eventual shift back to wrong behavior.

II Timothy 3:16-17 ~ All Scripture is profitable...for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work.

Swift correction is not only beneficial for children, but also for us as their parents. It is a good reminder to parents of God's chastening love for us. It reminds us of how He had to be against His own Son. He did not delight in seeing His Son bear the sin of the world just as we do not delight in correcting our own children. Correction of our children should increase our love for the Father as we remember we are HIS children always in need of correction -- and yet His love never falters because it is perfect. We should thank Him for correction because it (should) produce holiness in us as we become more like His Son.

Swift correction also benefits parents by producing a well-behaved child. As our children become more behaved, we will be able to rest from always correcting them.

Proverbs 22:6 ~ Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.

Proverbs 29:17 ~ Correct your son, and he will give you rest; yes, he will give delight to your soul.

John MacArthur has several notes that sum it up perfectly...

Notes on Proverbs 13:24 ~ Early childhood teaching requires both parental discipline, including corporal punishment, and balanced kindness and love. There is great hope that the use of the "divine ordinance" of the rod will produce godly virtue and parental joy. Such discipline must have the right motivation and appropriate severity. One who has genuine affection for his child, but withholds corporal punishment, will produce the same kind of child as a parent who hates his offspring.

Notes on Proverbs 22:6 ~ There is only one right way, God's way, the way of life. That way is specified in great detail in Proverbs. Since it is axiomatic that early training secures lifelong habits, parents must insist upon this way, teaching God's Word and enforcing it with loving discipline consistently throughout the child's upbringing.

Lest my readers think I am heavy on the behavior modification side, that is only because words can not even contain how much more important it is for children to first and foremost come to know Christ as their Savior. Yes, we parents can force improved behavior; but only Christ can save them from their disobedient hearts. Only He can provide a heart that will permanently and righteously alter their behavior. I pray earnestly that my children will follow His way.

I want them to know that my way IS His way.

Encouragement

I had a hard day last week. Hard emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Judah was fussy and tired. I was fussy and tired. The sun wasn't shining. And I was desperate for some encouragement.

I got it from reading in Psalms. In one of my Bibles, I have highlighted in yellow verses that are uplifting to me. That way I can flip through and read all of them at a glance when I am desperate for a drink of Water.

I happened upon one verse that was near a highlighted one.

I will set the Lord continually before me; because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. -Psalm 16:8

How many days to I set Him continually before me? The key word for me is CONTINUALLY. If He really is my First Love, my Savior, my Redeemer, my Friend...should I not be always thinking of Him. Should He not be the motivation behind every word, thought, and deed?

If I am at His feet every day learning of Him and from Him, how often would I have shaken days?

If my mind is continually stayed on the eternal, how often would I be irratable and frustrated with people and situations? With myself?

I am still working on memorizing Psalm 119:33-40, but this passage will be next for sure! Don't you wish you could know everything all at once? Praise the Lord that heaven is coming!

I will bless the Lord who has counseled me;
Indeed, my mind instructs me in the night.
I have set the Lord continually before me;
Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.
Therefore my heart is glad and my glory rejoices;
My flesh also will dwell securely.
For You will not abandon my soul to Sheol;
Nor will You allow Your Holy One to undergo decay.
You will make known to me the path of life;
In Your presence is fullness of joy;
In Your right hand there are pleasures forever.

~Psalm 16:7-11

Psalm 119:36

Incline my heart to Your testimonies, and not to selfish gain.

"Incline my heart"

My heart represents the seat of my feelings and emotions. My mind is the seat of my reason and intellect. Why not incline my mind rather than my heart? Because my heart is much harder to turn than my mind. Reason shows me that the truths of God are better than anything or anyone else. My mind easily follows that train of thought. But my heart has strong desires, and not always good ones. This is a plea to the Lord for Him to bend my HEART towards His truths. My mind is already there.

"Selfish gain"

Do I speak more of God's truths and His person more than I do myself? When I tell stories, is He the theme or do I shine brighter? So many times I hear myself telling of what has happened lately, but I do not recall centering it on the Father and what HE has done in my life lately. It is what I have done in my life. I also have heard myself telling someone else my testimony, and I seem to remember alot of detail about my life and but not alot about the eternal. Oh, sure, I bring God up and point Him out. But is my Listener going to remember me or remember what God has done for and through me? When I bring God up, what is my tone of voice and the expression on my face? Does my voice pick up in excitement and do my eyes sparkle? Am I truly giving glory to God? Or am I just speaking words to make sure I am seen as giving glory to Him?

May my heart be after His truths as I advance Him, not myself.

For Everything There is a Season

Well, it has been quite the while since I posted to The Sanctifying Truth. I needed a season of rest from the blogging world (save for getting pictures up on the other one) to learn how to be a mommy...and to learn how to post quickly and efficiently while I have a few moments! So, again I commence with a new topic...

Several weeks back, our pastor Jim mentioned something in a hermenudics study about reading Scripture. He said to read it several times when you are about to study it, emphasizing different words each time you read it. I've done it several times since then and WOW does it really open up a passage to you! It makes you focus on the meanings of each word and what they are referring to. I just received a new journal as a gift and decided to use it as a "Scripture Memory & Study" journal. Here is a sample, my first entry. I am memorizing Psalm 119:33-40 a verse at a time.

Teach me, O Lord, the way of your statutes; and I will keep it to the end. (vs. 33

This is what I wrote when emphasizing different words...

Teach I have much to learn me I want it, O Lord You are the greatest Teacher, the way it is a way of life of Your no one else's statutes unchangeable truths; and I no one else is responsible for me will with your strength I can choose to keep hold tightly and never let go it to the end when life on earth is finished.

And this is what I am doing after the initial day of beggining a new verse. I take it a word at a time and meditate on that word. So for today...

Teach - humility, trust, room to grow, listen and heed

You have to place yourself in a humble position to be taught -- get rid of your own know-it-all pride. You have to trust your Teacher fully to be really transformed. There is always room to grow...unless you are God. There is not point in requesting to be taught unless you are willing to listen and heed what is taught.

How Do We Get There?

True submission comes when self has been humbled. And it comes as the result of God's work in your heart.

Ask God to do this work in your heart and be willing to look at what He shows you, without excuse. Let the conviction come. When you see yourself through God's eyes, it will be ugly...but then you will change by His power.

So how do we live this out and truly become free? Remember 2 things...

1) Get the right attitude - HUMILITY. Deal with your own resistance fully, including worry and fear. Do business with the Lord and get clean!

But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble." Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.

~James 4:6-10

2) Use the right strength - GOD'S, not your own. Exercise true faith and walk by the Spirit. Learn to put up the sail of your boat and quit rowing! See Hebrews 11.

Remember, this is a process and you will fluctuate in your progress. If you respond in humility to the work God is doing in you, HE will get you there!

"That obedience which is not joyfully voluntary is disobedience." -Spurgeon

Let your gladness proclaim that you serve a good Master!

Understanding Submission

"Submission without faith is slavery; submission plus faith is power unleashed." -Bunny Wilson

When submission is lived out as God intended, we will have His strength and enjoy His peace. You will burn out every time you try to submit out of your own strength. "And GOD is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work" (II Corinthians 9:8).

We have some misunderstandings of the requirements of submission:
~"Doormat Syndrome" - Rather than serving out of duty and expectation, serve out of love for God and the family He has given you. Serve out of obedience to God. If you do, you will be cherished more and more by your husband and children.
~"I can't participate in any decisions. That's not submissive." - Not true! God has given you as a helpmate for your husband, not a slave. You are just as capable, if not more so in some areas, to discern what decisions are best. God has given you your own mind and His wisdom just as He has done for your husband. Be free to offer your opinion -- in love and at the appropriate time! Also, before and after you share your opinion, remember that your husband still has the final say because God has made him the leader of your home. Your husband may be right and you just can't see it at the moment. But if he is wrong, don't add to the consequence of that decision by becoming resentful and unsubmissive. We all make mistakes, and we all learn and grow from them. God will reward your obedience to Him and your support of your husband...which includes NOT saying "I told you so"...

God is after us and our attitudes. Your husband may be perfect, but most likely he is not. Even when he is difficult to submit to, you should not run to God expecting Him to change the situation or your husband. Yes, you can prayerfully ask for change, but never ever forget that God wants you to change as well -- always becoming more like His Son. When it is tough to submit, remember that submitting to your husband is really submitting to God. Then your attitude will be right, your obedience complete, and the situation WILL change because your perspective has changed...and your husband will probably change, too!

Submission puts us in the place of having to really look at ourselves. This goes along with the previous point. Instead of always asking, "God, change him," ask "God, change ME!" Submission is not hard because you have a difficult husband or tough situation. Submission is hard because we are sinful women. We want the control in every area of our lives. We extend grace to ourselves while laying down the law for others. Summed up in two words: pride, selfishness. Take your focus off of others and their "faults" and look at your own. You are responsible to be personally obedient to God. You are NOT responsible to make sure everyone else is obedient to God...or to what you want in life.

Today, see your OWN sinfulness and ask God to change YOU. Understand that your love for God should transcend the hardship of submission. You should love God so much that it is easy to submit to others....because you are submitting to your Ultimate Love and pleasing HIM!

Submission II: What Category Are You In?

We are all in one of three categories of submission no matter our marital status...

1) Rebelling Against Submitting - This is when your flesh is in full glory. Sin is ruling your heart. There is no joy in your attitude or service because you are in outright sin.

2) Dutifully Submitting - This is when your flesh is subjected but still very much alive. There is still no joy in your attitude and service, and tension is present in all you do. Submitting dutifully is using your own strength to submit -- this leads to bitterness and can be termed "Jonah Submission." Remember how he dutifully submitted to God's desire that the Ninevites hear of Him? His attitude was NASTY once he saw their repentance. Jonah was bitter that God had indeed kept His word to not destroy them. Jonah submitted outwardly, but his heart was full of resentment and bitterness -- subjected but living flesh. A good picture of this is being in a boat and rowing yourself to get to the other side. It's hard work, and you will fail if you do it in your own strength!

3) Truly Submitting - This is when the flesh is crucified and the Holy Spirit is free to flow through you. Harmony and peace rule your attitude and service which creates a home/family environment of harmony and peace. Yes, there may be times of friction when you must do battle between your old flesh and your new spirit to submit. But the peace is still there as the Spirit works on your heart and you obey. You will not fall into bitterness as you serve your heart out for others and follow your husband/father's lead time and again. Each time you successfully submit in true obedience to God's role for you as a woman, your love for Him and others will only increase, submission will become easier next time, and others will be drawn to you and blessed. In this boat, you have put up the sail and are letting the Wind move you. A much easier and more refreshing way to get to the other side!

True submission is where we discover the essence of God's power. In contrast, when we rebel against submission, we are quenching Him. We need to realize that God's ways are so wise and He knows exactly what He is doing. We must choose to believe it and obey Him -- submit to Him as we submit to those He has wisely placed over us. This is faith and "without faith, it is impossible to please God" (Hebrews 11:6).

Ladies, Get Ready!

Today was Titus 2sday at church, a time when alot of the women get together for study and fellowship. Today was about being "Liberated Through Submission: Seeing Ourselves Through God's Eyes." It was WONDERFUL! Yes, though I've only been married just a little while, I still have come a long way in the discipline of submission (discipline meaning both practice of and correction from the Lord in this area). At the beginning, the speaker asked who knew someone that would say submission is wonderful. I raised my hand with a few others. Then she asked who would themselves say that submission is wonderful. Praise God, I again was able to raise my hand. I know I have a ways to go and will never be perfect in submission (who will?), but I also know that for my age and stage in marriage...I am unique and mature in my view and practice of submission. I attribute it to God's grace in giving me examples of what not to do from both other wives and MYSELF and also by providing sound teaching in Home Ec on the roles of men and women in marriage.

So I will be posting the notes from today's lesson for a few days rather than Ecclesiastes. This woman has got it perfectly right. It would fit WELL into the level of teaching I gained from my professors! Why do I share them? Because it was a great reminder for me, and I want all of you to experience the freedom I have found in submission even in just a year and a half of marriage! Talk about making room for more love and joy within a marriage!

Introduction:
What we are going to discuss today is that God uses submission as a tool to free us from ourselves ~ which in turn brings us to the point where we can experience the strength of His power and the joy of His presence. It is at this place that we are that cleansed vessel that He can work through to use us in other peoples' lives ~ including our husbands.

Why do we not want to submit?
Sin ~ It is part of the curse; we want to be in control and we want to have it our way. Genesis 3:16 "...yet your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you." Desire for your husband here is not romantic in meaning. Part of the curse on women was the desire to be in control of others when in reality her role is submission.
Unbelief ~ We are afraid to let go and we doubt that we would like God's Way. I Peter 3:7 "You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered."
Fleshly (I Corinthians 3:1) ~ We have earthly thinking and our understanding is completely off. I Corinthians 3:1 "And I, brethren, could not speak to you as to spiritual men, but as to men of flesh, as to infants in Christ."

Whose view do you have?
We have a sin-tainted view of submission instead of having God's perspective. We need our minds renewed on the true meaning and understanding of submission. We have no idea that it is really a wonderful thing!

Isaiah 55:8-9 "For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways," declares the LORD. "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts.
Proverbs 3:5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.
James 3:17 But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without hypocrisy.

Next: The Three Categories of Submission...Which one are you in?

3:14 and a Prayer

I know that whatever God does, it shall be forever. Nothing can be added to it, and nothing taken from it. God does it that men should fear before Him.

Acknowledging God's enduring and perfect work will cause us to revere and worship Him as well as give our lives purpose and meaning as we go about our endeavors. Apart from Him, our lives and endeavors have no meaning and fall short of worthiness.

And take comfort in the fact that God and God alone is in control of everything. EVERYTHING. You can do nothing to mess up His plans for your life. You can do nothing to add to His plans for your life. He is completely sovereign and knows just how to orchestrate every detail so that your life will bring Him the glory due His name. If nothing else, that thought alone should take you to your knees in humble reverence and thanksgiving!

Journaled Prayer:

You are powerful and beyond time itself. And yet you choose to die, to forgive, to live in me. Father, how can I live for any other purpose than You? You made me eternal then chose me to be on Your right side. How could I ever be worthy of such a calling and purpose? I can never be worthy. You called me to a position requiring worthiness...then declared me worthy through Christ's blood. I never would have been worthy otherwise. That, Lord, is the wonder of salvation. Help me to grasp it and believe it all the more -- increasing in my wonder of You!

2:24, 3:11

Nothing is better for a man than that he should eat and drink, and that his soul should enjoy good in his labor. This also, I saw, was from the hand of God. For who can eat and who can have enjoyment without Him?

All is not lost in your daily labor, though much of Ecclesiastes talks about it's worthlessness. When your life's focus is on glorifying God and laboring for eternity, you will be blessed with not only enjoyment in the labor but also in knowing God is pleased and eternity affected. Labor without an eternal perspective is worthless and will cease when you do. Enjoy life in service for Christ! God WANTS us to...the verse says nothing is better than joy in the soul over life's work! We just have to see where the joy can be found!

He has made everything beautiful in His time. Also He has put eternity in their hearts, except that no one can find out what the work that God does is from beginning to end.

God made man for HIS ETERNAL purpose. Therefore anything we do apart from Him or His will for eternity is worthless and will not bring satisfaction to ourselves, Him, or others. Oh sure, maybe momentary satisfaction, but why waste your time and energy? And why sacrifice the ultimate satisfaction of seeing true beauty come out of His plan for your life?

Ecclesiastes: Introduction, 2:11, 2:18

So begins the Ecclesiastes journey... I am using Matt's MacArthur study Bible, and there were several thoughts from the introduction that were profound and set the tone for what I wanted to gain from Ecclesiastes. As far as actual study, I read a small section each day and then look at the notes for it. I then choose a verse (or two) that impact me most for that day, write it in a journal, and then write my own thoughts on that particular selection. In order to catch up to where I am now, I'll post a few at a time.

I pray that you all will see what I have seen. Some say to prepare yourself for depression when you study Ecclesiastes. I have actually found the opposite to be true. Ecclesiastes is quite a motivating book to make sure that EVERYTHING you do has eternal impact. It reveals one of our highest callings as Christians: to stop thinking of ourselves and live our lives for God and God alone.

Introduction Thoughts:

1) Avoid walking through life on human wisdom alone. Rather, live life by the revealed wisdom of God.
2) Vanity is the futile attempt to be satisfied apart from God.
3) The "abundant life" is obtained by seeing and accepting each day and ALL it contains as a gift from God...even the hard parts because they stretch and grow you.
4) The primary purposes and issues of life are to enjoy divine blessing and prepare for the Divine Judgment. (Now, if that's not motivation to live a life full of joy and eternal purpose, I don't know what is!)

2:11

Then I looked on all the works that my hands had done and on the labor in which I had toiled; and indeed all was vanity and grasping for the wind. There was no profit under the sun.

To expend God-given resources for human accomplishment alone is empty. This includes time and energy -- if you only have enough time and energy to clean the bathroom or spend time with God, which would be more profitable? Hint: which has eternal impact and will last?

2:18

Then I hated all my labor in which I had toiled under the sun, because I must leave it to the man who will come after me. And who knows whether he will be wise or a fool?

You may be a control freak, and you may keep a fair amount of control for your whole life. But you WILL eventually cease from this earth and no longer have control over your affairs. How does that make you feel? 1) Start letting go, be flexible, and focus on eternal matters. 2) Train up someone to have the same eternal values and leave your affairs with them.

Proverbs 22:6, "Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it."

Titus 2:3-4, "Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children..."

Freedom in Obedience

I know, I know. I have not posted on this blog daily as I said I would. I'm a faulty human. But...I've got a good excuse. The past several days have been quite FULL of Bible study and heart searching. I think God is trying to teach me about the principles of loving confrontation and seeking reconciliation with fellow Christians. He is teaching me the power and confidence that comes by always seeking the Spirit's guidance with words that must be written by me and read by another. He has revealed to me how to distinguish hurt from true anger within my own heart...and how anger really can eat away at you. Above all, He has shown me the amazing freedom that comes when I finally realize what I must do to obey Him...the freedom that has been there for months, if only I had been willing to see it.

Not to mention, I've got a close friend who has learned the same things this past weekend. I guess it's just the season of confrontation/reconciliation lessons!

One of the letters I have written contains quite a bit of Scripture. As I was searching for various passages to go with each topic, I saw more and more the simple but profound power contained in each verse. It was as if I had never really SEEN what was written. Sure alot of the verses were familiar, and I've even heard sermons on them. But maybe that's just it. They've been disected for me so much, that only when I studied for myself and my own purposes did I see the verse as a whole...a powerful whole!

Take James 1:26-27 for instance.

If anyone thinks himself to be religious, and yet does not bridle his tongue, but deceives his own heart, this man's religion is worthless. Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world.

Ok, so we've all heard the second verse before...many times in fact. But here were the two "Oh DUH!" thoughts that hit me:

1) In verse 26, it simply states that if you are religious -- you obey the Word, you pray, you participate in all sorts of ministry and service -- but do not have a bridled tongue, all you do is worthless. Worthless! Just because of the way you speak. The power in that statement? Our speech has the power to negate what we do in Christ's name. I haven't ever heard anyone preach on that.

2) In verse 27, I've only heard people talk about the orphans and widows part being pure and undefiled religion. But it doesn't stop there. Keeping yourself unstained by the world is also part of pure and undefiled religion. Of course! How can you serve effectively and have a proper witness if you participate in things the world advocates -- everything from entertainment to drinking to sex? I'm not saying we need to be legalistic and throw our TV's out the window, never touch alcohol, and become nuns and monks. It just amazes me that people talk about serving orphans and widows but never touch on making sure your life isn't tainted by the world as you serve.

I know these are simple realizations. After all, the words are there in plain text. But that is my point. I have seen the blatant power of Scripture in all this letter writing that I have done. I have come to ask why people do not clearly see and understand what is written. God has given us EVERYTHING we need for spiritual living and obedience to His will. And He didn't give it to us in riddles and rhymes. He has made it so easy for us to know Him more, to know what He wants of us, to know even our world's history from a spiritual perspective. All we have to do is open the Book...and just read!

So not only have I found freedom from the bonds of putting off what He was asking me to do, but in that obedience I have found freedom in seeing the simplicity of God's Word. It encourages me to study more because I know that it is able to be understood...without the aid of pastors, commentaries, Greek dictionaries...!

And isn't that how it is supposed to be? Know the Truth, because the Truth will set you free!

The Importance of Christian Friendship

Pastor Curtis Hall

1.8.06

Selections from Proverbs

Friendship Defined: a unique same gender relationship with common interests; a relationship that stretches and grows both persons involved

The Differences Between Community and Friendship:
Community reaches wide. Friendship reaches deep.
Community is a large group. Friendship is a small group.
Community is acquainted. Friendship is intimate.
Community knows when you are there. Friendship knows when you are missing.

1) Choose Your Friends - They are your guides. Proverbs 12:26, "The righteous is a guide to his neighbor, but the way of the wicked leads them astray." Choose friends who are going where you are going, doing what you are doing, passionate about what you are passionate about, and fighting what you are fighting. (II Timothy 4:16)

2) Love Your Friends. Proverbs 17:17, "A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity." Make I Corinthians 13 your mission for friendship. A true friend will not remove themselves from you during tough times. They will love you more. BE this friend to others, too!

3) Enjoy Your Friends. Proverbs 27:9, "Oil and perfume make the heart glad, so a man's counsel is sweet to his friend." You do not have to fear judgment from true friends. You can reveal your whole self and rest securely in them. This is pure enjoyment!

4) Protect Your Friends. Proverbs 16:28, "A perverse man spreads strife, and a slanderer separates intimate friends." Stop strife, lies, gossip, and perversion of or about your friends. They should do the same for you. (Proverbs 17:9)

5) Correct Your Friends. Proverbs 27:6, "Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but deceitful are the kisses of an enemy." Keep each other from destruction. Be vulnerable and controntable. Value each other's souls more than the friendship itself. (Proverbs 27:17)

Understand:
You can not be the perfect friend apart from Christ, who IS the perfect Friend. He can not be exhausted or stifled as we as humans can be. He is our model for friendship! What a Friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and griefs to bear...

These points will work in the world only in theory. They can only be truly fleshed out when Christ is the source and center of the friendship.

PRAY for good friends, and pray that you can BE a good friend! There is nothing sweeter than intimate companionship on the journey towards Christ-likeness!

A Fast Way to Grow Close to God

Pastor Jim Achilles

1.15.06

Matthew 6:16-18

Whenever you fast, do not put on a gloomy face as the hypocrites do, for they neglect their appearance so that they will be noticed by men when they are fasting. Truly I say to you, they have their reward in full. But you, when you fast, anoint your head and wash your face so that your fasting will not be noticed by men, but by your Father who is in secret; and your Father who sees what is done in secret will reward you.

Introduction

Fasting is the act of abstaining from food in order to accomplish a spiritual purpose. Fact: The New Testament never commands a believer to fast. It teaches about other spiritual disciplines with depth and power, but only in a few places does it describe proper fasting, and then only as an explanation and not as a command.

So should we or shouldn't we? That's not really the right question. The Lord's point in the Sermon on the Mount is not whether, but why! What are the motives behind our pursuit of spiritual disciplines? Do we truly long for His honor, His kingdom, and His will?

1) Fasting Defined - The act of abstaining from food in order to accomplish a spiritual purpose.
~ I Timothy 4:4-5 - You are not rejecting food, but abstaining from food.
~ Food represents one of our greatest physical needs. Fasting teaches us what it is to truly hunger and thirst physically, which translates to how we should be hungering and thirsting after righteousness.
~ Abstaining from something that is GOOD (food) for a time should push you to focus on something that is BETTER -- pursuing closeness with God and desiring righteousness.
~ Saying "I could never give up _______" shows idolatry and points out exactly what is distracting you from God and His righteousness...and therefore pinpoints what you need to give up.

2) Is fasting good to do? Absolutely!
~ In verse 16, Jesus says "when" and not "if." It is expected, though not commanded, of a believer's life.
~ The Father rewards proper fasting (6:18). You do not merit this reward by fasting though. He favors fasting and chooses to reward you (I Corinthians 4:4-5).

3) Reasons for Fasting
A. Grief - Matthew 9:14 ff, the Day of Atonement, Matthew 5:4, grief over sin especially.
B. Guidance - Acts 13 and 14. Food dulls your senses, so when it is lacking you are more alert and aware of both your body and your mind.
C. Spiritual Growth - When you have been stagnant, fasting is a wonderful way to refocus your thoughts and priorities. Every hunger pang will remind you of your need for spiritual satiety, just as you need physical satiety. Think of Christ in the wilderness for 40 days!

4) Worthless Fasting
A. To Promote Self (6:16-17) - You will have no eternal reward or spiritual value to your fasting if you do it to promote yourself in front of others. A genuine fast is between you and God, not you and others. How much service for Christ do you do so others will notice? Note: It is perfectly fine for people to KNOW you are fasting. It is impossible to keep it from your spouse. If they ask what you want for lunch, politely decline and let them know you are fasting. Don't make a big deal out of it, but don't be all mysterious about it.
B. To Earn God's Favor - God does not owe you anything, especially for arrogance that causes you to judge others as less holy since you are fasting. You are to favor God. His favor is reserved for Himself because He deserves it!
C. Not Resulting in Holy Living (Isaiah 58:6) - Obey the whole Word, not just the fasting discipline. Fasting is a discipline that is attached to holy living. You fast in order to focus on a sin area, worship, prayer, guidance, fruits of the spirit...anything that should be a part of our walk as Christians.

5) Benefits of Fasting
A. Exposes Your Greatest Desires - Are they in accord with or opposite from God's desires?
B. Teaches you to hunger and thirst for God (Matthew 5:6).
C. Increases your prayer life.

Important:
~ Do not argue with God or try to justify not fasting when you know He is calling you to.
~ Do not fast if you have health issues that would prevent you from doing so. Again, fasting is not commanded and you should not put yourself in harm's way to do so. However, it is still possible for you to abstain from certain foods or even from activities. The absence of certain foods or activities can also put your focus on God and His righteousness if you "fast" from them properly.

A New Beginning

I have finally figured out how to overcome my blogging dilema. So many times I wish to post about what I am learning in Scripture and from teachings at church. But I also want to post about life. But I don't want anyone to miss anything!

So, I have created a new blog for the sole purpose of posting what I am learning spiritually and what impacts me as I study. A couple weeks ago, I was really haunted by John 17:17 where Christ prays for His disciples, "Sanctify them in the truth; Your word is truth." I want to be sanctified. I want to be sensitive to my sin and confess it. I want to retain Scripture -- both in the way I should live as God's daughter and in the stories He has left us to see His glory. The easiest way for me to know Him and accomplish all of this...is to read the very words He has given us.

If no one reads, that is fine. I also see this as self-accountability. I will have nothing to post if I do not spend time in the Word and in prayer (except for the first few days when I post what I have already studied). But I do hope that my readers will gain encouragement as I post.

I will do several catch up posts. I am in Ecclesiastes right now and there are a couple sermons I want to post notes from.

Get ready to keep up daily!